I left my cravings where they were and
came here instead. The feelings were
so strong, nothing else would suffice.
I ran an errand to the post office. The
thought turned into a feeling, then a
stronger feeling. I thought of possible
substitutes on the way home. Donuts
wouldn’t fix this. A hike on my local
mountain trail would have been
helpful; but my feet weren’t up to the
task. After I got home, I sat down to
think. I couldn’t think so I killed a
million bubbles on my phone. The
thoughts returned. I know, some things
we can’t fix no matter how strong the
feelings, no matter how remote or
impossible it seems. Why do I keep on
trying to move mountains with a little
crowbar? Waiting is hard; real hard
when you don’t know what you are
waiting for. Waiting most of my life.
And I’m waiting again for the Lord who
said to Job, “Where were you when I
laid the earth’s foundation? Tell me,
if you understand.” Time to put down
the crowbar wielded by my impatient
mind and heart. Diffused for now.
Time to finish watching the movie
I started yesterday. Cup of tea, too.
No words for this last line, really.
Poet, Writer, US Army (Retired)
I dreamed of writing when I was a youngster. The love of books and writing may have helped to dull the pain of severe sexual abuse as I was sexually abused by two men at my father’s place of work from age 8 to 12 or so. I learned about this for the first time when I was 50 years old. So, as a boy, reading was the only place I had to go to. My fantasy world was better and safer than my real world. I loved reading and writing.
Reading books and writing poetry are a joy to me still and are an important part of my life. (See my About Me page on my blog for the complete profile.)